So today, I ran out to pay my taxes and get my little sticker for my license plate.  I have entered the debit card world and use it for everything these days.  I knew from the last time I was at the tag office, there was a small fee attached for using it, but so much easier to swipe and go.

As I approached the window, the teller next to mine informed the woman there would be a one dollar charge for using her card.  I get to my window and am told that my would be three (3) dollars and change.

OF COURSE I asked why I had to pay more than the woman next to me.  I was bluntly informed that the company that processes the cards takes a percentage of the value of the vehicle.

Clearly my car was three times more expensive than the other woman’s car.                    (I saw it for myself when I got to the parking lot)

When I complained of it being a rip off, the teller wasn’t happy.  Just kept bluntly telling me that I could always write a check.  (She’s probably had this complaint before.)  I couldn’t write a check, I didn’t bring my check book.

However, the idea of it all stuck with me on my trek back out of the new “Taj Mahal” of courthouses to my vehicle.

First off, we moved to the computer age and computerized everything so it would be cheaper than hiring people.  So now there are never  enough cashiers, tellers, clerks, the what not ANYWHERE, and now we are paying a FEE to use this computerization.

Now, we have this huge unemployment rate, a complete and total HASSLE every time we need to make a business related phone call.   First of all, we have to choose a language, and then follow through with a litany of choices and still sit on hold, get disconnected, or God forbid, have to start over.  We use our credit and debit cards and are charged a fee for using them.  I really don’t get that.  And now, percentages rather than a flat rate????

We are self serve.  WHY should we pay more to do the work ourselves.  Just like tip jars at food places that do orders for take out.  You called it in, you used your car and time to go get it.  WHAT have they done?  Nothing but cook it for the same price you would have paid except that you didn’t require the use of a table, silverware, plates, etc.  And even more importantly, a wait staff.  Surely they can afford one employee to hand out the bagged food.

I have tol question the idea of paying more for self service.  I would much rather be charged a fee for choosing to deal with a human, rather than a computer.  I am a good tipper of wait staff (have been one in a previous life).  But wouldn’t you much rather have them say, you can self serve for free, or it will be a dollar to have a human assist you!  I would.  If you are gonna suck every penny out of me for such rubbish, then by God, have a real human being help me.

I can’t believe the government couldn’t find a more reasonable contractor to do this tax processing.  What a scam.  As if it cost more to process her bank card as opposed to mine.

I have some other thoughts, but they will have to wait until tomorrow.

This morning as I was cruising through my Facebook page, I had one of those pop up suggested pages.  It was a “T” shirt ad.  On one side, it said “Dog Trainer” and the other said “Because Bad Ass Mother Fucker Isn’t An Official Job Title At Work.”

Well, I think this pretty much nails what is wrong with American society right now.  It’s more cool to be “a bad ass motherfucker” than to be a decent dog trainer, or educated professional in any aspect of life or employment.

The problem really isn’t about being “a bad ass.”  The problem is, it is being one WITHOUT any morals or values in play.

Those of us born before, say, 1970, are rendered nearly speechless at what is happening in our country every day.  This is why.  How is it that we are so different than those growing up behind us?

I think it has a lot to do with media.  The tide has changed from television shows with values and morals to pathetic, pointless, vignettes filled with canned laughter.  Clearly there because they don’t think you will know when to laugh, and because there is no real script writing with a point.

Our generations grew up when technology was developing and television was new.  We had shows like Lassie, Andy Griffith, and lots of cowboys, ALL of which ended in a way that you understood the “moral of the story.”  The characters had a conscience.

We also played outside, and yes, we played cowboys and Indians, we played army, and we even had real BB guns, and non child-proof drug containers back then.  We weren’t out shooting up the school or movie theatres.

The characters in our stories were clearly good and bad, and sometimes grey.  However, now, the blockbuster shows and movies are all about NON HUMANS and violence.

All they see is that the BADDEST motherfucker wins.  The emphasis is on win, not on working it out, or finding a way to resolve the issue, or learning anything.

What we saw were situations that were realistic to some degree, but the point was driven home.  People and animals died, yes, but they didn’t come back to life either.

These shows taught us the finality of some things and that once the lesson was learned, that we could move forward, having learned something that we would carry with us.

What does today’s media portray?  That the one who is willing to just kill everything, with no emotion or concern is the victor and that that, is the best way to be.  People with feelings and emotions are weak and disposable.

Today’s “bad ass” doesn’t have any feelings, just wants to “win” at all costs, right or wrong.  People are so focused on being at the top, that they don’t care how they get there.  The emphasis winning, whether or not you are entitled to, have the wherewithal to do it without cheating, killing, and to do it with no emotion.

They never learned that “winning isn’t everything.”

“Winning” isn’t even what it’s all about.

Whatever happened to doing the right thing, simply for the fact that it IS the right thing to do.  Because many times it’s hard?  Because by doing the right thing, you might have to give up an edge?  Because you might lose?

I think what has happened is that we have become so influenced by Hollywood fantasy, that our priorities are backwards.  It’s no longer “cool” to be a decent percent.  It’s “cool” to be a bad ass or to take advantage of someone’s misfortune for self promotion.

The link to this video shows what today is something that should be a daily occurrence, but instead is a touted on the news.  Fortunately, there are some young people who are not influenced by Hollywood, and have some sense of what’s right, and for someone besides themselves.

http://www.faithit.com/softball-player-torn-acl-opposing-team-rounds-bases/#.U2J5ypoSDAD.facebook

One of my pet peeves is the use of the word “passed” instead of saying someone died.  They didn’t go by you, they didn’t refuse something, they DIED.

Why people want to use this word???  The first time someone said this to me, I stood there and wondered for a moment what the hell they meant?  Passed what?  GAS???

I am from the South and as I grew up, I did not hear this term.  It’s only until recent times that it has gotten popular to replace the word “died” with “passed.”

Maybe they feel it’s a softer way to break the news, but I just prefer to be more clear.

If they were murdered, killed in an accident, or died in their sleep, they did not pass.  They were killed or they died.

I assume the use of the word might have a religious connotation, such as they passed into the afterlife.  However, everyone doesn’t believe in an afterlife.

So let’s just keepcommunication clear, they DIED!

Many of you may know this, however, I didn’t, so I would like to share this little bit ofhandy thinking with you.  Could save you some money too!

Ever need to add fluids to machinery like the car, the tractor, the lawn mower, and need an elusive funnel?  If you have a plastic soda or water bottle, simply cut the bottom half off, remove the cap, and EWWWW, AHHH, you have a funnel.

Something so simple, that many of us have probably overlooked, or in my case, just never thought of.

Being one of the big proponents of “our society/America” is going to Hell in a handbasket,” I have to say, one of the many reasons is that NOTHING is special anymore.

With some psychology in my background, one of the many things I learned and have seen in person, is that routine and order are one of the keys to getting people on track.  This is one of the first basic methods for teens in distress and it’s why young men got sent to boot camp in the past.

Not only did they learn to be neat, tidy, on time, and to develop some basic organizational skills, like getting up on time, get things done to be ready for the day, their work, and how to dress, which gives them a feeling of accomplishment and security.

Yesterday, I saw something on the news about a young girl going to Prom in pants and a jacket.  They showed a photograph.

Along with the news anchors, I was surprised to see that she was wearing really not a nice jacket and slacks, but a sort of outrageous punk almost gangster looking clothes.

REALLY.

Our society has gotten to the point that try to excuse everything because people don’t have money, OR it’s their right to freedom to do as they please, or it really doesn’t matter.

Well it does matter.  In a subconscious, subliminal way, we have dumbed down our ways to the point that no one has the “want to” to succeed any more, or to achieve, or even care.

Oh, there are still some overachievers out there, wanting Prom gowns in the thousands of dollars, limo’s and the like, but this girl was upset when she was told by school authorities that she was not dressed appropriately.

Well, SHE WASN’T!

Before we freak over the idea that the “poor thing” couldn’t afford a dress, let’s go back.  First off, her outfit was NOT tattered. It was tacky (in my opinion of course).

But school is one of the places where we start learning the hard lessons of life.  One of those is that there are occasions where certain attire is required.  Prom is one.  It is a FORMAL setting.  One in which you are required to dress appropriately.  This prepares you for future endeavors where you are expected to dress within a certain standard.

If you don’t learn that you have to dress for certain situations as a high schooler, how are you going to get anywhere in life?  Some colleges require in person interviews, almost every job in life requires an interview.  Weddings, parties, receptions, events.

Dress for success!  We’ve all heard it.  Well, if you let teenagers get away with doing whatever they want, then how can you expect them to be successful in the future?

One of my favorite movie examples is from “Remember the Titans” with Denzel Washington.  Denzel takes over a newly formed interracial high school football team.  He is taking them on buses to a college campus for spring training.  He tells them that he expects them to wear a suit and tie on the bus.  Knowing that they are not all from privileged backgrounds he tells them, if they don’t have it, buy it.  If they can’t afford it, borrow it from their father or uncle, and if they don’t have one of those, to find a bum on the street and trade him for it.

Today, poverty is no real excuse.  There are so many programs to help girls get decent prom dresses.  You can buy, rent, borrow, and the thrift stores are full of them.  Pick up cans, get a job, do something to EARN the money if you need money for a dress.  That leads to the “want to” and the sense of accomplishment that she will need for the future.

Boys, the same goes.  Most are fortunate, because generally at that age, one just rents a tuxedo.  So they can go wash cars, cut grass whatever, to earn the money.

Everyone is susceptible to peer pressure and high school, as we all know, is the worst place on earth for it. Part of confidence building is knowing what is expected and being able to fulfill expectations.  Anticipation, or the looking forward to an event, requires thinking and preparation, planning.  All skills that one will need for life.

Oh, and before anyone brings up the fact that maybe she is gay and does not choose to wear a dress, much as Ellen DeGeneres, then wear a tux!  Ellen certainly dresses very nicely for the occasion as the Oscar hostess.

But the bottom line of letting go of standards for what people consider, the little things, like dress leads to the “who cares’ attitude about everything which snowballs into a mountain of apathy.  And apathy is what is killing our society and our country.

Feel free to comment.

I realized that I started my blog last year on Easter, so, I guess I’d better pick it back up again.  Feel free to share with your friends.  I will try to do better from now on.

As a reminder, overly critical or negative posts will be removed.  I don’t mind a difference of opinion on here, but being nasty will not be tolerated.

But for now it is Easter, so here’s a video you can watch to make your Easter special in whatever way you spend it.

I’ll try to post something interesting to talk about tomorrow.

Okay, so, had to take a few days for my husband’s knee surgery.  Doing fabulous!

So, today, I figured I’d better get on with it, since already the spam crap has hit the blog.  Cleaned that out and set it up for mobile users, and checked my e-mail.  THAT provided fodder for today’s blog.

We will eventually get around to some specific topics, and hopefully draw a few more of you into a conversation, however, today’s is such a subject of contention for those of us who have ANY sense of manners or decency, or let’s go so far as to suggest common sense???

Being a member of internet groups.

Just because you are sitting at your desk, in your bed, in a cab, or on a plane, and have some privacy does not mean you throw all conventional behavior out the window.

Remember, if you have a gripe with someone in particular, or have more personal comments to address to or about that person, PLEASE do NOT involve the entire community in your drivel.  BE AWARE that when you post to a group, how many people receive that post that has NOTHING to do with THEM and they DO NOT CARE about your personal preferences, empathy, or your other non-essential commentary.

Just because you are unemployed, retired, or otherwise just sitting on your ass wasting a beautiful spring day inside on the computer does not mean that they are.  Many people lead very productive, busy lives, employed or not.  For a variety of reasons, they choose to receive these messages individually and DO NOT CARE to be subjected to your ridiculous, no need to state to the public, comment.

SPARE yourself the reputation as a moron, and learn that on Face Book, you have the “private message” option, which is that little button on a person’s home page that says “Message.”  Go to their page, put in their name and you will find it.

THERE is where the two of you can commiserate all day long about your bursitis or whatever the hell the issue is, that ONLY the two of you care about and need to discuss between the two of you!

There is also the little “chat” button on the bottom right hand corner that you can use to.  That way, you can drivel with three or four people at once!

In Yahoo Groups, READ the GUIDELINES!!!  When you join a group, give a BRIEF introduction of yourself, wait a day for everyone to give individual welcomes, and THEN address them as a group, thanking them for the warm welcome.  You can e-mail them individually if more personal contact is made.  No one cares to read about how you both love to make home made jelly and how you do it.  If they do, they still do not want their phones, notebooks, computers or other devices binging on and off all day as you two go back and forth about the best way to cook up your apples.

If there is a topic on the board, then keep your post to the topic, DO NOT take up other people’s time with your lack of service by someone on the group, or BASH people.  If you paid for something and didn’t get it, then take it up PERSONALLY OUTSIDE of the group.

On Face Book, keep your comments related to the TOPIC of the PAGE.  Don’t wish people happy birthday, or bring up other people if they are not members of the PAGE GROUP, advertise your own work, or anything not related to the TOPIC.  People have cross over interests, and go to those PAGES to enjoy the SUBJECTS of the PAGE, not deal with the same boring conversation that they get elsewhere.

ALSO, just because someone is a member of the same group, does not mean that they want to be your personal friend on Face Book.  It also doesn’t mean that they do not like you if they do not accept your friend request.  If they deal with you on a page, they may not feel the need to have you intertwined into their everyday life.  People today lead complicated lives and compartmentalizing them via Face Book and Yahoo can really work for them.

It’s okay to make friends outside of the group and keep it that way.  DO NOT TALK ABOUT OTHER GROUPS within the confines of a group for which all the members of said group are not members.  Yahoo and Face Book groups are like churches, members get into it with one another and next thing you know, there’s a new church on the corner or a new group started up.

Lastly, let’s talk about photographs.  IF YOU DIDN’T TAKE IT, DON’T SHARE IT WITH ANOTHER GROUP!  On Face Book, if it requires more than clicking the “share” button to share it, then DON’T!  Don’t share a friend’s album with your friends.

So pretend that instead of sitting alone, miles away from any of the people you interact with, where you feel safe making snide comments, or wasting other people’s valuable time with your drivel, that you have to face these people every day, and you might find that your internet behavior improves.

So, now that I have wasted some very valuable time inside, it is time to go outside into the gorgeous Spring weather.

Have a great day!

D. B.

Okay, so I let a few folks know that I’ve started this.  I hope they understand that it is important that they make some comments here. 🙂 !  At the same time, we did get a little comment from yesterday, so based upon my research before starting this, I did okay!  LOL!

I have to say, that yesterday’s blog was inspired by my third trip to that shop, in which unfortunately, Red, got to put the toppings on my sandwich.  I watched her like a hawk, and was grateful to see her ever vigilant manager there and the other woman with her cheery greeting, who could have made all the sandwiches for the entire shop in the time it took Red to put the toppings on my toasted sandwich.  As for the wrapping, all I can say is “Oh MY GOD!”   Jarrod would be appalled.  Why this girl has a job mystifies me.  Are we that hard up for help.

I guess what I was trying to say yesterday, was that with all the professionals out of work, who need to feed their families, employers turn down these people because of their fear of leaving for professional employment.  WHY NOT HIRE THEM ANYWAY????

Come on, they will be there every day, happy to have a job, and understand the importance of being there, on time, doing the job to the best of their ability, making use of down time to clean up the place, speeding up when they have an overabundance of customers and able to make that customer service friendly idle chit chat.  Hell, they might even give some type of tip to customers in other areas.

Is that really such a risk compared to a teenager with a baby, who calls in sick, regardless of the fact that it is the busiest day of the week, coughs all over your bread, looks at you with dead eyes, and drags your order across the counter and rings you up without even looking at you?  One that has to look at pictures of the food on the register??? And my all time pet peeve, can’t count the change back to you!

I have to run out for an appointment, but have something else to talk about later.  For those of you who want to continue with my blog, please note, you can follow it by clicking on some buttons, and it will notify you or something.  Blogging is new to me, but it will be very helpful to me if you do follow!

Have a great day, it’s beautiful here in the South, at least for today.

D. B.

Nowadays, it’s always something, isn’t ?

Take today.  I had some errands to run and decided to stop at Subway to get some sandwiches to take home.  Well, I have been to this particular shop two times before.  The first time I was there, I watched in horror, as the red haired white female clerk coughed all over the bread of the two young white female customers.  They, too, were horrified, but said nothing.  Fortunately the black female manager calls across to this spreader of disease to throw the bread away.  This girl, looked back and said, “Huh?”

I mean come ON!  Who does not know that a) it is beyond common courtesy to cover one’s mouth when coughing, b) that she has just spread her cold germs all over her gloved hands AND the customer’s bread! and c) this is the reason we have health codes and inspections!  As Will Smith so aptly says in Men in Black, “I mean, DAMN!”

The slovenly girl does so, still wearing those germ topped gloves, when the manager instructs her clueless self to go in the back.  Oh, the girl wasted no time going to the back and then out to the seating area, where she took a drink of her soda and wrapped up her own sandwich.

Meanwhile, the poor manager, who has to be a mother, etiquette coach, sandwich maker, AND manager, comes over, tosses that second loaf of bread in the trash and begins making the orders.

I am relieved as this woman begins to make my order, and as she does so, Red (I’m sure you know who I mean), shuffles back into the food area, puts her hand under the soap dispenser, where I could not discern whether or not she really got a dollop of soap, and holds her hand under the water, sort of rubbing her palms together slowly.  I don’t know about you all, but my momma made me WASH my hands, not rub them together.

Unfortunately for those behind me, Red began with the sandwich making again, all the while clueless.  The lack of care, concern, or motivation to work was clear in her eye.

I thanked the manager privately, informing her that I would have spoken up had she not.  She told me that she has to do this with several of her staff, and stated that Red had a baby.

Okay, so the point of all this ranting is this:  We wonder what the hell has happened to America, this is what has happened.

Where we were once a proud nation, proud to do a good job no matter what job it was, we have reduced ourselves to a society of people, who just do not care.  I am beginning to think that this is the norm rather than the exception.

I mean, with all the adults who have responsibilities on their shoulders who are out of professional work, who would be happy for the opportunity to work there and do a good job, we are forced to eat sandwiches made by someone who at best will spread her young child’s contagion to us!

Why????  Well we’ll address that another day.

Feel free to give your ideas on why we are in such a situation!